Great Phrases from Politicians

The following phrases uttered by politicians might be useful to you when you find yourself in a desperate situation where you know you must admit head on that you have done wrong, lied or is just plain ignorant of whatever you are talking about.

Case 1: You got caught in the act doing something you are NOT supposed to do.

Phrase to use: “It was a lapse in judgment. I (pause) am (pause) sorreee…”

Uttered by: The alleged Philippine President Gloria Arroyo after being recorded on tape during the national elections talking over the phone to an election commissioner asking whether the latter could guarantee a difference of at least a million votes versus her closest opponent.

Case 2: You lied. In fact you just imagined everything. Don’t admit you told a lie. Just use the phrase below.

Phrase to use: “I misspoke. It was a misstatement.”

Uttered by: Hillary Clinton after being revealed to have lied, err, misspoke about her sniper fire-filled visit to Bosnia. The sad thing actually here is the daughter Chelsea was somehow also been pressured to corroborate her mom’s lies.

Case 3: You don’t know shit about what you’re talking about.

Phrase to use: “I’ll try to find you sumthin’ and bring them to yaah.”

Uttered by: The now infamous gaffe generator, republican VP candidate Sarah Palin.

There you go!

And if it happens to be the case that you are in the receiving end of such phrases, there is one standard answer you can use:

” my ass!”

Example: It was a lapse in judgement. Then say, “Judgment my ass!”
Or I misspoke. Say, “Misspoke my ass!”. Or “I’ll bring them to yaah”. Say, “Yaah, bring me that ass!” Oops! LOL!

That should do the trick and bring the erring person to his/her senses.